Non Monogamous Relationship: Top 5 Must-Have Conversations to Succeed in an Open Relationship

Non Monogamous Relationship: Top 5 Must-Have Conversations to Succeed in an Open Relationship

Sometimes, creating an Open Relationship Agreement is trickier than we think. It often involves lots of genuine conversations that is void of judgment.

Here we suggest some conversation ideas for you and your partner to talk over as you deliberate the idea of an Non Monogamous Relationship.


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How to Make an Open Relationship Work: Dating Advice & Dating Tips

Here’s our Top Relationship Advice on the 5 Must-Have Conversations to make your Non-Monogamous Relationship work … Enjoy!


1. What is your threshold for protection/safety when it comes to sex with your other lover(s)?

For the simple reason that both of you would be engaged in intimate acts with people beyond your relationship, responsibility is crucial in ensuring that you both don’t bring unwanted diseases into the relationship.

The last thing you’d like to happen is to be HIV infected because your partner engaged in unsafe sex elsewhere.

It’s equally bad to become a parent to a child who is not even yours.


2. What are the types of sexual experiences that thrill you and make you excited? Conversely, what are those that makes uneasy or anxious?

Talking about this can work two ways – firstly, you learn more about what turns your partner on. Secondly, it may very well rekindle the interest you have in your partner.

Perhaps this was a conversation that you both should have engaged in eons ago; you didn’t need to engage a relationship specialist if only you both talked frankly about sex.

You’d be amazed by how excited this conversation can cause you both to become if you’re both open and frank towards it.


3. What types of lovers would you look for? What are some pre-requisites you have of your lovers? What are some of the qualities you’d be attracted to?

Again, pondering over this question and having open discussions about it helps you to understand your partner better. At the same time, it helps your partner to understand you too.

If it doesn’t go that way, treat it as a way to prep yourself for feelings of jealousy that you’re bound to experience when get to know that your partner is bonking with someone much more capable than you.


4. What is the line you’d draw in terms of your sexual experiences (only blow job, penetrative sex, no BDSM etc)? Is there anything in particular you feel is a definite no-go?

You’d be amazed by how horny you both could get when you have such conversations.

Nothing is more exciting than talking about each other’s deepest, darkest fetishes and desires.

Again, the key here is to be frank with each other. There is no point to hide your desires.

Just come clean, and you’d never know what surprises it might bring. Chances are, your partner will reciprocate and share their side of the story too.


5. Some other questions that you can consider are:-

(a) Should our home and/or bedroom be out of bounds?

(b) How would you handle it if your lover asked for a sleepover?

(c) What can I do to make you feel emotionally safe with me?

(d) How accessible should I be when I’m spending time with my other lover(s)?

(e) How often should we be checking in on one another and having some heart-to-heart conversations?

(f) What happens if you find yourself falling in love with your lover(s)?

(g) How would you visualize your ideal relationship to be like with your lover(s)?


Concluding Open Relationship Advice on How to Make a Non Monogamous Relationship Work

So, why would these questions on Open Relationships work?

The above guiding questions seek to understand more about your partner, what she desires and what is her intention of being in an open relationship.

Largely they are open-ended question that allows for much thought, reflection and discussion as you run through them instead of just making an exhaustive list of rules and boundaries that one has to follow without any rationale behind it.

Remember – a successful and enjoyable Open Relationship should take into account that rules and boundaries may change with time.


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