Platonic Romance: Top 3 Ways to Better Understand the Meaning of Platonic Friendship & Platonic Relationship
When you hear the term “Platonic Relationship”, you can’t help but think that it pretty much is an oxymoron.
How can a relationship that is platonic also be romantic? What is a Platonic Friendship even?
Why is it so rare that people don’t believe it exists? We answer your questions and queries on Platonic Dating in this insightful article.
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Today, the term “platonic” is mostly used to describe a relationship in which the people involved are practically acting as a couple, with the exception that they aren’t intimate with each other. In the past however, the term “platonic” has a much more interesting connotation historically.
The term “platonic” is actually a derivation of Plato’s name, despite the fact that he himself never used the term.
To Plato, the initial meaning of the word “platonic” had absolutely no relation to intimacy or lust.
He described it as a relationship which inspires us to evolve into upgraded versions of ourselves, to attain higher goals, and bring us closer to divinity.
However, let us not dwell on the past, and instead focus on Platonic Dating as seen in the eyes of the world today.
For a simpler explanation, we can say that a Platonic Relationship is the fuzzy feelings of fondness you feel for a friend which is pretty similar to “love”, but this feeling is directed towards someone you have no sexual attraction for.
It is a feeling which we actually experience pretty commonly, but which we fail to realize or identify.
When you get that feeling that you like someone intensely, but don’t feel like rushing into bed with them, that is platonic love.
It is only a fine line with the breadth of a hair which divides Platonic Friendship from love.
Most people don’t know the difference, and try to cross the line – and are puzzled when they fail to do so.
Of course, a Platonic Relationship can always progress into romance, unless there are irreconcilable factors which prevent the two people from doing so.
Preventing the Platonic Friendship from progressing into a sexual nature is possible, but it is difficult, bordering on impossible to do so unless strong willpower is involved.
There are many stories of “Successful Platonic Relationships”, but are these stories really true?
Are these relationships platonic in nature, or is someone in there holding back for the sake of maintaining the friendship?
If neither of them is holding back, what makes their relationship a “Platonic Friendship” instead of being just “friends”?
The rarity of a Platonic Relationship in this day and age, does not mean that we are any more lustful than our ancestors, or that we have a lack of self-control.
As odd as it may seem, the reason behind its rarity might be because we’ve become more civilized.
Civilization gives birth to new ideas and norms, and reshapes what is deemed as “socially acceptable”.
By Plato’s terms, the feeling of love was defined as the time when someone or something made you felt satisfaction and joy in life.
However, he never made the restriction that this feeling was to be described only in a heterosexual relationship.
When you hear the term “platonic” these days, it’s almost always used to describe the relationship between a man and a woman. It doesn’t always have to be so.
As mentioned previously, people today are deemed by social norms and morals which were created by modern civilization.
Under these rules, it is prohibited to display affection beyond a friendly hug or kiss with someone other than your significant other.
However, when you truly love someone, even platonically, your emotions will spill forth and prevent you from being satisfied by these shallow deeds.
Platonic Friendship is rare, because of how society has shaped itself over time.
The rules which govern society has extrapolated itself to govern the way in which we think.
Our idea of actions exhibited by our partner which is considered “cheating” has been shaped by that same society.
This creates mental and emotional unrest, pain and distrust between people who love each other deep down.
Having someone else other than your partner with whom you resonate on an emotional level is considered “cheating” by the rules of today’s society.
How can you feel an emotional connection with someone other than the partner you already have? Of course you can.
There will always be someone who resonates mentally with you on a better frequency than your partner, but you feel no sexual attraction towards them.
No matter how much you wish to deny it, this situation is very much possible.
However, society deems it inappropriate, which is why your partner feels jealous or insecure when a platonic romance with a member of the opposite sex surfaces.
The paradigm of a Platonic Friendship then becomes a stumbling stone in that couple’s relationship.
On the one hand, the one involved wishes that they could tell their partner everything about their platonic relationship, because they have nothing to hide.
On the other hand, they hold themselves back from doing so because they do not wish to stir up unnecessary questioning and jealousy.
This situation then becomes a downward spiral of distrust when their partner finds out about the platonic friend on their own, and misunderstand the relationship that person has with their partner.
Having a Platonic Relationship is not a bad thing, as long as the people involved know to stay within their limits, and are not interested in testing the waters to cross the line.
However, if you start to feel a welling affection for your friend that is much greater in magnitude than what you feel for your current partner, you will soon be in trouble. It’s high time to do something about it.
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