Best Free 10 Gay Hookup Apps and Sites: Key Features, Pros and Cons

Key Takeaway: For the best array of gay men and finding different tribes, here are our top gay free versions of gay hookup sites.

1. Best gay hookup site for older gay men: DaddyHunt – Offering an app site, you can easily access different gay men across the world and nearby who meet your needs.

2. Best gay hookup app for the most options: Grindr- Searching for instant gratification here is as easy as making a cup of coffee, with the variety of gay men here.

3. Best gay hookup app for scruffier men: Scruff – The uncut diamond of Grindr but just as fun.

4. Best gay hookup app for bears and bear chasers: GROWLr- If you have a specific bear fetish, this app will bring all the furs in the world into one app.

5. Best gay hookup app for diversity: Jack’d- Looking for more diversity? Jack’d is big on inclusivity.

6. Best gay hookup app for no labels: Surge- Open to all gays who are looking to hookup outside the labels.

7. Best gay hookup app for live content: Blued- Who say you can’t multitask while looking for your next hookup? Meet people through Live sessions instead of scrolling through grid profiles endlessly.

8. Best gay hookup app for more than hookups: Taimi- Expand your only gay community to rainbow communities with Taimi.

9. Best gay hookup app for community programs: Hornet- Earn points by contributing in endless ways and be rewarded with a premium subscription or even Amazon Gift Cards. Best for giving back to the gay community while on the hunt!

10. Best gay hookup for finding men who are not on other apps: Wapo- Big in Spain, Italy and other countries, this is a great alternative to explore when you’re travelling and want some exotic hookups.

Table of Contents:

  1. Best gay hookup site for older gay men: DaddyHunt
  2. Best gay hookup app for the most options: Grindr
  3. Best gay hookup app for scruffier men: Scruff
  4. Best gay hookup app for bears and bear chasers: GROWLr
  5. Best gay hookup app for diversity: Jack’d
  6. Best gay hookup app for no labels: Surge
  7. Best gay hookup app for live content: Blued
  8. Best gay hookup app for more than hookups: Taimi
  9. Best gay hookup app for community programs: Hornet
  10. Best gay hookup for finding men who are not on other apps: Wapo

 

If the gay dating scene is bringing you a whole lot of headache, you’re not alone.

Enough with having to dress up to impress and splurging on an expensive night scene, just to meet hot guys.

Plus, instead of the risk of needing to deal with approaching the wrong kind of guy (those who are not interested in hookups), you can find them on free gay hookup sites, right from your couch.

Put yourself out there for the men who are looking for the same things as you and even find those who have your kind of fetishes.

With loads of options out there, finding the right gay hookup apps can get pretty daunting and eats up a lot of your time.

We’ve compiled the best and free gay hookup sites and apps for you a hassle-free experience to find hookups online.

 

1. DaddyHunt: Best Gay Hookup Site for Older Gay Men

 

Source: DaddyHunt/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gay, bi and curious Daddies and guys that love Daddies, who are looking for hookups, friendships, chats and relationships.Over 4 million4.4

 

Key Features
  • Has a site version making it easy to browse on a bigger screen
  • Has a huge array of options of men
  • Easy to use
What We Like
  • Hassle-free sign up
  • Don’t need a profile to browse
  • Segmented to nearby, global and newest members.
What We Don’t Like
  • Need to pay to find more members
  • No filters on a free account
  • Expensive premiums

 

Availability: Website, iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

3 months pr

emium: USD 6.99 per month (after 3 days free trial)

12 months premium: USD6.75 per month

 

If you like the option to surf the net on your pc or laptop, then this is the best online hookup app site for you.

Created as a gay dating and social network for the gay, bi and curious men to meet others who share the same fetishes as you.

It actually states out there to the world that it celebrates the older gay men and to create a healthy, fun alternative to meat-market website.

To be blunt, the term Daddy means older men looking to date or hookup with younger men.

With 3.5mil users already on board, you’ll find a wide variety of gay men there who are otters, bears, wolves and other gay men of your choice.

You can sign up and browse even without doing up a profile yet.

This gives you a great opportunity to look around to see if it is what you’re looking for before starting your hunt.

To make your search easier, they have a HIV status and safer sex practices section in the profile space.

And because your sexual health is important, they have even included a testing reminder to help you so you don’t miss. a HIV test.

On a free account, you can browse around looking through a limited amount of profiles and no filters but they do segment them according to gays nearby you, global members and newest members.

If you like what you see and want more options, they have two options for their premiums.

This will open up access for you to see who viewed you, search by location, view unlimited profiles, advanced search and filters, easily send recent photos and videos and see who’s online now.

So if you still prefer kicking it old school on a pc or laptop, give this gay hookup website a shot.

 

2. Grindr: Best Gay Hookup App for the Most Options

 

Source: Grindr/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
Primarily for gays but marketed for gays, bi, trans and queer people looking for hookups, chats, dates, friends and relationships.Over 13 million4.5

 

Key Features
  • Tons of options
  • Easy navigation
  • Appealing layout
What We Like
  • Fast hookups
What We Don’t Like
  • The dick photos can be too much sometimes

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 month premium: USD 19.99

3 month premium: USD 39.99

12 month premium: USD 99.99

 

Grindr is the most talked about gay hookup app in the world.

It’s also known as one of the the first geosocial app for gay men since launching in 2009.

While they have shifted their branding towards being a mobile social networking app for gay, bi, trans and queer people to connect, you’ll find mostly men here.

A must-have app for those who have been looking for “gay hookup near me” on their Google search.

It definitely gives off the gay meat market vibes with men flashing their abs or belly in their main profile pictures.

You’ll easily be presented physically with descriptions of your vital statistics and vitals and distances.

In other words, Grindr screams gay hookups from the get go when you enter the app.

With a grid view for you to scroll through many profiles in one go, the profiles are sorted according to distance and you can view who are nearby.

Once you find someone of interest, you can tap on the profile picture, which will bring you to the member’s full profile, options to chat, send a tap, send pictures and video call.

Don’t be alarmed if you get dick photos sliding into your chats as it is a norm here.

You can chat with anyone without matching for free.

So, definitely a great free gay hookup app for the perks you get on a free ride.

They also have premium membership options for you if you plan to use the cash, that you would usually use to pick up men in a bar, here.

The premium memberships will give you access to unlimited profile, who viewed you, browse profiles incognito and unsend messages and photos.

With more than 3 million daily active users, Grindr can get addictive to many which has raised concerns by certain groups including mental issues.

Grindr is the considered the best gay hookup app out there but should be use moderately to avoid spending hours on it in a day.

 

3. Scruff: Best Gay Hookup App for Scruffier Men

 

Source: Scruff/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gay, bi, trans and queer guys looking for hookups, friendships, chats and dates.Over 15 million4.5

 

Key Features
  • Different kind of options of men
  • Easy sign up
  • Easy to navigate
What We Like
  • People are more polite here versus Grindr
  • Worldwide connections
What We Don’t Like
  • Limited filters on a free account

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 month premium: USD 19.99

 

As you have derived from the name, Scruff is the unpolished version of Grindr and you’ll see men who like a little scruff.

Find a great spread of different gay tribes such as Jocks, Daddies, Military, Leather and Otters here.

Every order of size, hair and kind are all here.

Scruff definitely tends to attach those looking for a gay hookup and NSA but you’ll also see those who are looking for dates and relationships here too.

If you prefer not to be confined to choices nearby and want worldwide connections, then Scruff would the better choice compared to Grindr.

Also using a grid like profile, they have more sections for you to explore such as their Discover page.

You get to see who’s online around the world, who are new and nearby, most Woof’d for the popular ones, and you can see who viewed you on a free account.

People here seems to be more “polite” here versus Grindr as they don’t open with a dick photo.

If you’re tired of the dick photos and actually want to chat a bit to get to know them first, Scruff has your back on that.

In your profile, you can fill up your body stats, hashtags of your interest including #bottom, communities and interest, pronouns and gender identity, relationship, HIV status and your social media pages.

Their basic filters allows you to search a certain location, name, community and what members are into.

Their upgraded version will allow you to narrow it down further with attributes and preferences.

So if you feel Grindr is too “pretty” for you, then Scruff would your best choice for a fiery gay sex hookup.

Plus, there are more to do here with the introduction of Scruff Match where you get sort of a wild card session and you can swipe through who you like and don’t like, when you’re tired of scrolling through grids of profiles.

 

4. GROWLr: Best Gay Hookup App for Bears and Bear Chasers

 

Source: GROWLr/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For Bear Chasers are the men who love BearsOver 10 million4.4

 

Key Features
  • A community for bears and bear chasers
  • Easy to use
  • Can find global bears
What We Like
  • Easy sign up
  • Don’t need a profile to browse
  • Segmented to nearby and global members.
What We Don’t Like
  • Sometimes buggy
  • Overall design and feel of app could be better

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 month premium: USD 9.99

3 months premium: USD 23.99

6 months premium: USD 44.99

1 year premium: USD 71.99

 

Calling for bear packs and bear chasers to hunt on this land!

Created by bears for bears, they’ve put a lot of thought of what the community want in a a dating app.

Claiming to have 10 mil members, GROWLr is great to find bears worldwide and nearby.

The app’s layout also a grid view and looks similar to Scruff.

This app is great to find where all the bears converge worldwide in the Events section and also bear bar listings in your area.

Their “More” section however, reminds you of those 90s online forum in terms of their layout but it’s straightforward and functional.

While their filter section allows you to find people according to location, their stats, what they’re looking for and when they’re last active.

You can also view what members are looking for such as chubs, polar bears, no strings attached and silver daddy.

Instead of paying for a subscription fee for the usual boosting of profile, you can opt to purchase a “Grr! Shout!” to all users in any location and within a 5 to 20 miles radius and they’ll let you know your reach.

Businesses may find this useful to advertise their place or even events.

Their pro membership allows you to view full-sized unlocked private pics unlocked private videos, saved searches, live video calls and ad-free browsing.

You would also unlock 100 more bears in the galleries.

While there is definitely room for improvement, GROWLr is definitely the best option to find bigger guys.

 

5. Jack’d: Best Gay Hookup App for Diversity

 

Source: Jack’d/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gay, bi, trans and queer looking for hookups, NSA, friendships, chats and relationships.Over 10 million4.4

 

Key Features
  • Diversity
  • Easy sign up
  • Appealing layout
What We Like
  • Inclusivity is always welcomed
  • Hookups near and worldwide
What We Don’t Like
  • Limited filters on a free account

 

Availability: iOS and Android

1 month premium: USD 9.99

3 month premium: USD 123.99

12 month premium: USD 322.99

 

If inclusivity is what you’re looking for, then pick Jack’d for your next download.

They promote themselves as the most diverse gay, bi, trans and queer app and they definitely show it in their marketing.

Black and asian men grace their photos on their websites and app stores.

It boasts 5 million members, spanning in 2,000 cities in 180 countries.

They believe in bringing people of different backgrounds, body types, experiences and preferences.

Their interface is a reminiscence of Scruff that also gives you a grid view of profiles.

The search tool allows you to screen for men from a specific location, their online status, age range, height and weight.

Like Scruff, you browse through men nearby and globally.

You could also click on the hashtags on other members’ profiles such as #Geek or # Bear to find others who have similar hashtags in their profiles.

They also have a section called Jack’d Match if you’re missing the swiping scene and let the app present you possible choices.

A free account is decent enough to get some matches but if you want to take it up a notch, try the pro version to get 1,000 profiles in your grid, more data insights, unsend messages and more search filers such as sex preferences.

So if you’re looking for more diversity in your hookups, you may find Asian and Black gay men here depending on your area.

 

6. Surge: Best Gay Hookup App for No Labels

 

Source: Surge/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gay, bi, trans and queer looking for hookups, casual dating, friendship and long-term relationships.Over 3.5 million4.5

 

Key Features
  • Open community
  • No labelling, focusing more on people’s personalities
  • Easy navigation
What We Like
  • Doesn’t feel like a meat market
  • Great choices of men nearby
  • Easy sign up
What We Don’t Like
  • Limited features on a basic account


Availability
: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 month premium: USD 11.99 per month

3 months premium: USD 7.99 per month

1 year premium: USD 5.99 per month

 

If you’re not into the whole labelling of tribes, you would find this app refreshing.

Standing out from Grindr, Growlr and Jack’ed, Surge doesn’t believe in putting a label to yourself but instead welcomes everyone to join in the fun.

Surge is the gay version of Tinder in a way, whereby users swipe on members to find your type.

A huge difference between its competitors and main players of gay dating apps, is that you won’t feel like you entered a meat market.

No half-naked pictures (at least in our area) flashing across your skin that it could be deemed SFW.

The interface is clean and easy to navigate through while being free of glitches so far.

The one thing we would pick on is the fact that there are no filters, not even a basic one on a free account.

So you’re shown whatever the app picks for you only.

However, this app has gotten good reviews from the gay community in terms of its range of matches and also overall use.

Also some users find their premium membership has been deemed pricey for the amount of features you’ll get.

It is more expensive per month compared to Jack’ed and Growlr but more affordable than Grindr.

A premium account would allow you to find out who liked you, change your swipe decisions, go incognito, unlimited daily likes share 3 private photos and you change your location anytime and check out local guys before travelling.

So, we would say to try it in your area first because it’s still great to find near you and local gay men in your area, before deciding whether or not it’s worth your money.

 

7. Blued: Best Gay Hookup App for Live Content

 

Source: Blued/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gays for hookups, NSA, friendships, connecting and relationships.Over 40 million4.4

 

Key Features
  • Large community
  • A gay social app
  • Not your typical dating app
What We Like
  • The interactive features in the app
  • Has a little something for everyone
  • Easy sign up
  • Can state your intentions in your profile
What We Don’t Like
  • The LIVE could make or break the app
  • Can get a bit too much at times

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 month premium: USD 9.99 per month

3 months premium: USD 19.99 per month

1 year premium: USD 59.99 per month

 

If you’re looking for an app that offers more than just hookups, then Blued is the answer.

Marketed as a gay chat, gay dating and live stream app, this app is packed with features such as watching live content, one-to-one video call, meeting hot men and expanding your LGBTQ+ networks.

Claiming to have gained 54 million gay men worldwide, you’ll find men you don’t usually find in the other apps or sites.

You’ll be able to make friends while scouting for your next hookup.

Their Live sessions are definitely where the crowd is at, as you can connect to people locally and globally.

It is a sure way to gain attention fast and to find matches here.

The Live sessions have attracted popular hosts, who you can choose to follow to get notified when they are going live.

These hosts are given incentives through the use of Beans and Coins.

With more coins gained they can convert it into Cash and the same goes to their Beans.

So, no more swiping and waiting around forever for responses.

However, if you prefer meeting men the usual way, they have a grid view of men just like Grindr in their Explore section.

It’s arranged according to those nearby, online and new faces.

With their video call function, you can anyone there without revealing your number so points for privacy there.

Blued is China’s biggest gay men dating app and is owned by BlueCity BLCT.O.

BlueCity’s CEO, Baoli Ma, was recently recognised as the first person from China to receive a spot in the “OUTstanding 100 LGBT+ Executives List”.

Interesting fact is Ma was a closeted policeman who founded one of China’s first and most influential LGTQ online forums called Danlan in 2000.

Blued is a hit and miss to some, depending on what your needs are as some may find it too chaotic with the LIVE feature, while some found it great to linking up the community together.

So, download it if you’re looking for more than a hookup app such as making new connections and friends.

 

8. Taimi: Best Gay Hookup App for More than Hookups

 

Source: Taimi/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gay, lesbian, transgender, and bi looking for hookups, chats, friendships and dating.Over 9 million4.4

 

Key Features
  • Rainbow community
  • Connects you worldwide
  • Social media network
What We Like
  • Easy to use
  • Genuine users
  • Social media feed
  • Live Feed
  • Feature Request
  • Community groups you can join and create
What We Don’t Like
  • Limited in its gender identities
  • Intention options could be expanded to more than just “dates” or “chats” for casual relationships.

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 week premium: USD 4.99

3 months premium: USD 44.99

1 year premium: USD 71.99

 

Taimi is another great community-based or social network app to hop on if you want to meet new people.

It’s stylish yet user-friendly interface definitely appeals to a younger crowd.

Hitting a milestone of 9 million members, it’s quite possibly the largest LGBT+ platform where gays, lesbians, transgenders and bisexuals are welcomed to join.

So, if you want to expand beyond the gay community and learn more about the rainbow community, you’ll enjoy this app.

This app is never done in introducing new features to constantly hook you into coming back and you may end up spending hours on it, not looking for a hookup but to connect.

You can post stories and statuses here within the app to keep in touch with others and also this is a great way to highlights you in the app.

For matches, you can chat with people who you’ve matched with and you’ll be presented one profile each time where you can take the time to scroll through the profile.

Then pick “X” or a thumbs up to like or skip them.

They also have a Rainbow Like (ups your chances of getting matches) you can use but a free member has limited access to that unless you pay for additional ones.

On a basic account, you can use their basic filters such as preferences distances (for 10-80km you would need to pay), what you’re looking for, if you prefer top, bottom or switch as well as age range.

If you prefer the international crowd, utilise the Live sessions to link up to connect with the hosts.

Safety and security is no joke to the people behind Taimi as they’ve set up several verification options including linking your account to your Facebook, Snapchat and photos.

A cool feature about this app is their Feature Request, where you can post what you would like to see the app and vote for it.

All in all, Taimi is worth the time to explore and if you enjoy it and want more out of it, you can upgrade to the Taimi XL package.

 

9. Hornet: Best Gay Hookup App for Community Programs

 

Source: Hornet/Apple

 

User BaseNo. of UsersRating
For gays looking for hookup, casual dating, intellectual chats and long-term relationshipsOver 30 million4.6

 

Key Features
  • Great gay community
  • Connects you worldwide
  • Social media network
What We Like
  • Easy to use
  • Genuine users
  • Social media feed
  • Feature Request
  • Community Programs
What We Don’t Like
  • Ads unless you pay premium
  • Limited filters on basic account

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 week premium: USD 8.99

3 months premium: USD 21.99

1 year premium: USD 39.99

 

Founded by software entrepreneur Christof Wittig and financier Sean Howell, Hornet is a gay social network app.

With over 30 million users, it’s the app to download that goes beyond proximity and stats.

It is open for friendships, casual meet ups and serious relationships.

Its homepage will remind you of Facebook with stories at the top and posts at the bottom for you to scroll through to see what’s happening in the gay world.

The Search section will be the spot to be to find other guys near you and there’s a tab there for Stories by the Hornet team where they share news related to the the LGBT community.

Rather than being limited to only the usual grid profiles, you can also search for guys using hashtags to discover those who share the same interests.

Some of their popular hashtags include #quarantine, #gaybro, #gaymer, #friends, #bottom and #love.

Even if you’re not flying out anytime soon, you can also search for guys in other countries (without the premium price tag to boot!) by inputing a new location if you prefer to keep your connections online only for now.

You’ll be able to take your hookups international when borders open up!

They have a Home feed where men would post about themselves, see what others are posting, liking and commenting on the post.

Hornet is dominating the markets such as France, Russia, Brazil, Turkey and Taiwan and is growing in the United States.

Even if you’re not flying out anytime soon, you can also search for guys in to other countries (without the premium price tag to boot!) if you prefer to keep your connections online only.

You can also set your age preferences.

For others such as height, weight, role and looking for, you’ll need to upgrade to a premium account to enjoy those filters.

Plus, this presents a big window of opportunity to connect with cute men in France, Italy or anywhere you please. Go wild!

A great place to catch up on the latest queer news is the Stories. This section features news, entertainment, health, travel, culture, videos and a little NSFW stories on the side.

To fully reap the benefits of this section, we would recommend exploring it on desktop to search stories using the different categories as the app version only shows the latest stories and top stories.

Another cool scoop about Hornet is that it is big in building a real community by inviting users to contribute to their Hornet Community Programs.

To name some, try the App Translator, Beta Tester (where you get to be one of the first to tests out new features) and Feature Guy.

Hornet sweetens the deal further where your contributions don’t go unrecognized!

You get to earn points and redeem them in their webshop for rewards like a Hornet Premium Subscription or even a USD50 Amazon Gift Card. Talk about giving back to the community!

 

10. Wapo: Best Gay Hookup for Finding Men Who are Not on Other Apps

 

Source: Wapo/Apple

 

User BaseRating
For gay, bi or curious men looking for casual dating and hookups.4.3

 

Key Features
  • Easy to use
  • Attractive choices of men
  • Private photos
What We Like
  • Loads Latino heat
  • Different men presented from other apps
  • Great if you’re travelling to Spain, some parts of Europe or live there.
  • Fast sign up
What We Don’t Like
  • May not do so well outside of Spain
  • Still needs to grow its US userbase

 

Availability: iOS and Android

Free version: Yes

1 week premium: USD 4.99

3 months premium: USD 14.99

1 year premium: USD 47.99

 

Wapo adopts a grid profile layout like the rest but doesn’t leave any room on letting others know on the relationship status except your role.

So, if you prefer something fast and not filling up loads of profile details, then this is the no-fuss app you’re looking for.

It arranges their guy sections according to nearest, local, travel and global.

Wapo is the biggest dating app in Spain so this gives you an indication of who you would find in the global profile grid section.

For a free basic account, you get to explore gays nearest to you so this is great for finding someone nearby for casual dating.

You also get to filter them by hiding guys who are offline, no public photo, active, active/versatile and passive as well as age range.

And some have said that this is better than a lot of the apps in terms of affordability out there so we would say it depends on your area and if gays nearby have signed up to use the app.

A monthly subscription is merely about USD4.99.

If you’re in luck, you’ll be meeting desirable matches near you as free users are presented 100 profiles.

Their premium features include read-receipts, load unlimited nearest guys and you can lock your face photos for privacy.

All in all, worth a try as the team found a new line of gay men that you usually won’t catch in other apps!

 

Which Hookup App Should I Choose?

 

It all depends on your preferences and you could be trying out a couple to find what works best for you.

We’ve given you the lowdown in our list above to help you narrow it down in hopes of finding the best fit for you!

Also if you’re looking for gay teens hookup apps, be aware that most dating or hookup apps don’t allow those under 18 to join, as they’ve come under heavy attack in the past as there were concerns that these apps could put teens at risk of inappropriate contact.

 

FAQs

 

Q1:How to get your first gay hook up?

A: 1. Decide What You Want

While you may be excited to just jump into a hookup, you need to determine what you want first so you don’t waste your time or your partner’s time.

Ask yourself questions such as:

What type of men am I into? Otter, Bears, Jocks?

What am I into in bed and open to?

What is a big no-no?

 

2. Use Updated Photos

Be confident of who you are today and don’t use photos from years ago.

You don’t want to be the dude known to mislead people.

Everyone comes in different sizes and shapes and everyone has their own thing.

 

3. Skip Those Without Pictures

There are quite a number of those who don’t post any photos on gay dating sites/apps.

Skip them and even report them.

Also, if you find anyone dragging a conversation but going nowhere, don’t bother and just politely say “thanks but I don’t think this is going anywhere” and leave.

There are plenty of choices out there especially with the list of apps and sites we listed above.

 

4. Be Friendly

Make simple greetings and be direct too such as “I really dig your picture. What brings you here?”.

You can inject some wit as well to stand out.

Nothing creepy but just friendliness.

 

Q2:What are the best gay hookup apps?

A:Check out our list of best gay hookup apps above to find steamy hookups nearby or worldwide.

 

Q3: How to have a gay hookup?

A: The good news is you don’t need to head out to a pub and put yourself at risk out there to find a gay hookup.

Instead you can browse through your best options at the comfort of your home and do it right with our best and free hookup apps up there.

 

Q4: What was the first gay hookup site?

A: Although Washington Post has recognised Grindr as the first big dating app for gay men, gay men were already hooking up using Craiglist Personals as it was totally free and people from the LGBTQ have met up and hooked up here.

Craigslist personals ads sections were removed in March 2018, in the wake of Congress passes of a new legislation called “Allow States and and Victims to Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act of 2017” legislation.

 

Q5: How to find a gay hookup anonymously?

A: Apps like Grindr and Scruff allows you to hookup anonymously as there’s no photo verification but hooking up anonymously is always risky.

So, even if you and the other person don’t post up your real photos (you’ll usually see half naked pictures in there anyway), you should request for real photos through the available are chat rooms the apps and sites offer.

Also, share your location with a trusted friend or two and tell them if they don’t hear from you in a couple of hours, to send a rescue squad!

 

Q6: How to ask for a gay hookup?

If you’ve been wanting to find out how to let a gay guy know you’re interested to bang, here are several tips.

1. Tap that on Grindr, Scruff

You don’t have to message them directly to let them know you’re into him.

Apps like Scruff allows you to “tap” those who have caught your eyes and the other apps have similar capabilities as well.

2. Ask him out

If you’re meeting them on hookup apps, this may not be necessary.

But everyone is different and asking him out is a good way to gauge if you vibe with him and if you’ve that sexual chemistry you’re looking.

Not to mention, it’s safer than showing up at a stranger’s door and not know what you’re walking into.

Yes, it’s dark and mysterious but it could also be dangerous.

Go for a drink and just chat and remember not every meet up have to end up with a hookup.

 

3. Gauge the interest at the end of the night

At the end of the drink, if you feel comfortable and liking what you’re seeing so far, then ask him if he would be interested in taking the chat at your place or his and would like a sexy evening with him.

Then take it from there!

 

Q7: How to get hard for a gay hookup?

A: If you’ve had gay hookups before and have been experiencing some issues in getting it up lately, do know that you’re not alone.

It may be happening due to anxiety, nerves or maybe even masturbation before hooking up.

If you’ve always masturbated with porn, try to do it without or try to not masturbate before meeting up.

Also know that erectile dysfunction is a common sexual problem affecting many men (including gay men), no matter what age you are.

Do check with your local GP to make sure you don’t have any medical issues as erection problems could be an indication of high blood pressure, heart issues, diabetes or even low testosterone levels.

If it’s not a biological issue, it could be a psychological due to anxiety and it’s important to talk to a therapist (or your partner if you’re with someone) about this to get the support you need.

 

Q8: Where are some known gay hookup spots?

A: In the US, there has been documentation of bathhouses in LA and New York.

Public parks, beaches, gay bars, discos and mall bathrooms were known public hookup spots for gay men to go cruising.

 

Q9: Where gay people can go to hookup?

A: On our top picks of hookup apps of course!

Covid-19 has changed how gays have approached casual encounters.

A study of more than 1,000 men who have sex with men across United States in April 2020, showed that while about half reported fewer sexual partners than before the pandemic, only 1% reported more, with 48% reporting no change.

Some resort to just sexting (or gay adult chats) and flirting on hookup apps rather than meeting up with anyone.

But it is not recommended to be out and about unnecessary (like heading to the pubs to pick up men) during this pandemic crisis.

So, download those apps and check out your choices first before deciding anything physical.

 

Q10: Why are married men on gay hookup sites?

A: For a lot of gay men, expressing themselves sexually plays a big part of their lives.

Sex is pretty essential for a feeling of connection, excitement and validation hence why they’re on the sites.

So, it’s pretty common for men who are in relationship or are married to be in hookup sites, even with their partners on them too.

 

Q11: How do gay hookup apps affect relationships?

A: This article was written by a gay psychiatrist and has shed some very important light about this.

The issues include that sex is made accessible by hookup apps which makes it real hard to let it go, even if you’re in a relationship.

Imagine having all these gorgeous men right at your fingertips 24/7.

He also said that using Grindr may keep men from finding long-term relationships.

If a gay couple gets into a fight, instead of working through the issues together, one of them or both would be in the apps finding an alternative, making monogamous relationships not sustainable as one or both would be constantly cheating.

All in all, some may become too addicted to the apps and the easy sex they offer.

 

Top 10 Gay Hookup Rules

 

Before you roll into anyone’s sheets, it’s important to know and follow these hookup gay hookup etiquette to fully indulge in the fun, minus any drama.

Save yourself the trouble and read on our gay hookup tips to make your hookups much more pleasant and easygoing.

 

1. Don’t Beat Around the Bush With Your Intentions

Before you can be upfront about your intentions, you need to be honest with yourself on what you want and what you’re ready for.

If you’re only into sexting and flirting for now, tell people from the get go, either with the intention setting in the apps’ profiles or when you chat with anyone in the apps from the very beginning.

Men looking for hookups may get frustrated if you’re not clear about this and will find you to be a time waster.

So, let people know in advance.

 

2. Timing is Everything

If you’re texting in the middle of the wee hours of the morning, it indicates you’re looking for a booty call.

But if you’re looking to chat only, it may pissed people off to find that you’re texting to chat only.

If you’re definitely looking to hookup that night, then by all means try your luck but be clear about what you’re looking for from the beginning.

 

3. Safety First

Don’t go to any places you’re not familiar with.

Be sure of the neighbourhood you’re stepping into when hooking up.

 

4. Condoms Please

Don’t assume the person has it all ready for you but always come prepared instead.

Even if someone is inviting you over.

 

5. HIV Status

A lot of the apps come equipped with the function on updating their HIV status and when they were last tested.

Do update about yours and don’t lie about it.

It’s important to protect your sexual health and your partner’s as well.

If the status hasn’t been updated in awhile or is not available, do ask them about it and if the other person gets offended about it, you know it’s best to move on.

There are so many choices available on these apps anyway.

 

6. Reply Messages

Most of these people can see who are currently online and if you receive a message during that time, do take the time to get back to people.

Even if you’re not interested in them.

You��ll want people to do the same down the line, instead of leaving you hanging or ghosting on you.

If you’re truly busy, then don’t go on the app till you’re available so you don’t end up being looked as being rude.

You don’t want missed opportunities along your hookup journeys and regret later on not replying that yummy guy who was online.

 

7. Clean Your Place

If someone is coming over instead, make sure to do your dishes and clean your toilet!

Even if it’s a hookup, it doesn’t mean you don’t make your place presentable at the very least.

A dirty place can be a real buzzkill.

 

8. Hygiene Matters

After you’re done cleaning up your place, make sure you clean yourself too.

Nothing stops a steamy hookup than bad hygiene.

So, take a thorough shower and shave if you need to.

 

9. Tell Them If You Don’t Want to Meet Again

If they say they would like to see you again after doing the deed when you’re leaving, tell them nicely that you’re aren’t interested in seeing them again.

While you may feel guilty about it, it’s way worst to lead them on and just suddenly block them when they had no idea what’s up.

 

10. Leave After the Deed

Don’t spend the night and leave as soon as you’re done.

Exchange numbers if you had fun and want to meet again.

But if you’re not into it, tell them too and don’t play games on them.

 

5 Ways to Make Your Gay Hookups Safer

 

Whether you’re a newbie or experienced, these tips are necessary to know when you’re planning your next sexual encounters.

While the mystery on who is on door number one may get you hot and heavy, anonymous casual encounters through gay hookup apps can put you in great risks in terms of your physical safety.

These tips will make you feel safer and more comfortable when you meet someone at a hotel room or their place.

This can only mean that your experience would be much more pleasurable and you don’t end up stressing unnecessarily.

 

1. Ask for Pictures

While Grindr feature a lot of half-naked men, you should ask for photos of his face as well.

If the answer is somewhat aggressive or even ridiculous such as them not having any, you know better than to go over his place.

With every phone built with photo capabilities, it doesn’t take long to snap a picture and send it to you.

Don’t bother meeting anyone who can’t do it.

 

2. Video Call

To ascertain someone’s identity, you should definitely utilize the built-in video calls before even meeting up IRL.

Grindr has already included this function.

If the app doesn’t have that function, you can arrange a Zoom video call or exchange phone numbers (if you don’t mind) to FaceTime or use other external apps to do it.

Exchanging numbers are not a bad thing as you have at least a trace later just in case.

 

3. Don’t be Shy To Share Location To Friends

There are plenty of friend finder apps out there you could use to share your location from your phone.

If you’ve friends you can share your location indefinitely, even better.

Text them to let them know you’re heading out to hookup and if they don’t hear from you in an hour or two or don’t detect any movement, they know what to do!

4. Agree on What is Okay in Bed

If you’re only okay with using condoms, tell them from the beginning.

Or even agree on what positions both of you are cool with, whether it’s bottom or oral to make things clear.

Don’t assume that the person is okay with everything before settling this first, to avoid any misunderstandings or raining of anyone’s parade.

 

5. Leave if You’re Uncomfortable

Don’t feel obliged to stay if you don’t feel safe.

Be upfront that you’re not into this and that you’re leaving.

And if the person tries to persuade you to stay, always remember that you’ve an option to leave and you shouldn’t be forced into anything you feel uncomfortable about.

 

-end-

(Last Updated: 1 February 2021)


About the Author
Kelvin Kevin is the Chief Marketing Officer and Chief Content Editor of the World-Renowned HappyMatches.com Dating App and Dating Site. An avid writer since young, he is an Expert Dating and Relationships Coach for Casual Dating, Serious Dating and General Dating. You can follow him on Twitter (@HowToDateBetter), and also check out his personal Dating Blog, for the latest Dating Advice and Dating Tips to help Straight, Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual Singles and Couples find and enjoy Fulfilling and Intimate Dating Relationships.


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