At some point in your life, you’ve heard someone telling you that hooking up is great.
Whether it is a sexcapade during holiday trips, in college or even a night out painting the town red, you’ve heard all the stories and have been curious about it.
Call it what you will. Just plain ol’ sex. Casual Sex. No strings attached. One night stand. They all point to the same direction – hookup.
Hookup culture started to gain its momentum since 1920s, thanks to movie theatres and automobiles picking up during then.
The American Psychological Association (APA) defined “hookups as uncommitted sexual encounters between individuals who are not romantic partners or dating each other”.
Chances are if you ask around friends, who are young adults, they will tell you they have encountered some form of casual sexual encounter.
Among college students, the hookup culture is extremely common, but it often gets a bad name for the lack of emotional ties in sex and the risk of getting STDs and infections.
While all these are well-founded, hookup has its bright side as well.
At the end of the day, it all boils down to what you want and not feel obligated to do it because others are.
So, you need to do you and not look at the person next to you. If you think this is the path for you, read on to find out why hookup could be good.
Here are the top 4 positive reasons why hookup culture can be great!
Hookups allow you to experience all the physical perks of a relationship but minus the emotional baggage, commitment of time and energy. Casual sex encounters allows you to explore what you like in bed as well as your sexual identity too.
It is not new that some who are unsure of their sexual identity, explore casual sex to know more about themselves and find out what makes them tick.
It could be your way of discovering new things about yourself that you never knew and learn different things with multiple partners.
And when things are made clear from the start, it makes things easier to navigate through this territory. That means make your intentions known and what you would like, while also talking about what you’re open to and what is a no-no for you.
This will open doors for you like you won’t believe!
Despite all the hate that some spew on hookups, Time reported that a research done by NYU and Cornell dispels the popular misconception that casual hookups will leave you feeling low and sad.
Those who go under the sheets with no-strings-attached, come out with better well-being, lower stress and great overall emotional health.
Also knowing that the other partner is also on the same page for an uncommitted relationship, takes away all the negativity- the shame, feeling it is wrong and feeling guilty about it. You are able to be more of yourself and free to explore your sexual preferences and identity.
To add to that, this study published in the US National Library of Medicine National Institutes of Health, found that 71% of first-year college women reported at least one benefit of hooking up. Some 23% of them found sexual satisfaction, 21% experienced general positive emotions while 11% had increased confidence.
It also found that some women appear to take the hookup path to clarify their feelings, meet romantic relationship partners and also potentially lead to a real relationship.
So, say hello to lower blood pressure, lower stress levels and improve your general health!
By meeting like-minded people, you get to avoid the awkwardness of what comes after and you’re not tied down to the other person just because you had sex.
So, no dealing with hours of drama from the other side (as long as they are decent human-beings), you get to focus on your studies or work commitments and just your awesome life in general!
While you’re at it, you get to explore the fishes in the sea with multiple people before deciding which fish you want to keep by your side.
Hookups gives you the opportunity to learn about different personalities out there and how to build a connection with them.
The whole experience would be a huge learning curve on what you would want in a partner, what you deem as toxic behaviour and huge no-no in characters.
This would better prepare you if, and when you do decide to pursue something more serious in future.
If you’re dead-on about not being a committed relationship in future, you still take home great sex experiences (we all hope you get that), a little more wisdom on what you prefer under the sheets, meeting different people and potentially expanding your network if you find any benefits in the connection.
You also learn a lot on how to deal with various people even in everyday situations.
If you are only interested in being friends, you should tell them. If you choose to never see them, also talk to them. Don’t lead the person on as it would cause unnecessary heartache and also awkwardness.
No matter how tempting it may be to take the easy way out, don’t ghost them! The world would be a better place in being honest and mature.
If you are going to scrutinise the other person when they’re naked, don’t judge them and above all, don’t tell them. It would sour the mood unnecessarily. Think about it. You wouldn’t be in bed with them if you were not attracted to them in the first place.
As for the deed itself, be open to one another about what is alright and what isn’t even during the act itself.
You can always ask the other if they are okay with it and that it is alright to stop whenever either one of you feels uncomfortable.
This is very (very) important. Hookups must be based on consent from both sides. And this goes to both men and women. If they are not interested in hooking up, politely walk away.
If they appear to be high but you are genuinely interested in them, leave them your digits or get theirs and try again when they are sober.
This can’t be said enough. Men, do use a condom to prevent any STDs or STIs. It’s always better to play it safe rather than having to deal with the regrets and unnecessary pain later.
(Last Updated: 28 September 2020)
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